


The Space Between Us

by Rosesforexo



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: 7dream, Both of them, But nothing extreme, Chaotic Good, Fluff, Gay Panic, Light Angst, M/M, My First Work in This Fandom, NCT Dream - Freeform, POV Alternating, Slow Burn, Work In Progress, cause everything will be created and killled in my notes, did i mention how this is a cliche teen rom com, ill update the chapters while writing, im not gonna make them do anything other than holding hands and cheek kisses, is this alternate universe, jisung and chenle are innocent childhood sweethearts, nomin might have sexual tension in the future, owhh and, the idol life which i dont know shit about but still proceeds to write, we'll see how, yup now you know, yup thats all for now byeee
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:47:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24826297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosesforexo/pseuds/Rosesforexo
Summary: "Yes I’m capable of love. Mind your business"Jeno said slamming the door to his room making the loud noise to get down Renjun's bones like he just got electrified. it's not every day, well its almost never, you see Jeno losing his cool over the topic love. it was a known fact, whoever that knows Jeno personally knows that Jeno doesn't do the dating thing. He doesn’t date and there was never any particular reason for it. He just simply didn't want to share his personal space and his precious resting time that is freakin hard to get when you are a member of a well-known idol group.a.k.ana jaemin is the newly added member of nct dream and his presence may be slightly hard to ignore for jeno, who is not into love or dating.
Relationships: Lee Jeno & Na Jaemin, Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin, Park Jisung/Zhong Chen Le
Comments: 10
Kudos: 54





	1. the boy, Na Jaemin

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for even thinking about clicking on this TT  
> u know that one picture of nomin where jeno, eyes closed, smiling, be leaning on jaemin's shoulder (i know u are asking which one?) but yea that cute pic is the inspiration for this. i just started crapping stuffs but then i ended up writing more than i should so here i am now posting this. i don't usually post my writings here, they all die in my notes, no joke. yea but i really hope you can enjoy this. i tried my best and English is not my first language so I'm more than happy to correct the mistakes i made, just let me know nicely yea.
> 
> Song recommendation for 1st chapter: strawberries and cigarettes by troye sivan :)))

"Yes I’m capable of love. Mind your business"

Jeno said slamming the door to his room making the loud noise to get down Renjun's bones like he just got electrified. it's not every day, well its almost never, you see Jeno losing his cool over the topic love. it was a known fact, whoever that knows Jeno personally knows that Jeno doesn't do the dating thing. He doesn’t date and there was never any particular reason for it. He just simply didn't want to share his personal space and his precious resting time that is freakin hard to get when you are a member of a well-known idol group. So the whole idea of dating someone which comes with lots of unnecessary touching and invasion of privacy just seemed so foreign to Jeno and he honestly never understood why anyone would gladly do it. But that doesn't mean he hates couples. He lives with Jisung, which means, a lifelong free ticket to a low budget teen Rom-com shit. He's so used to the sight of Jisung smiling at every word Chenle utters that sometimes without realizing it warms a part of his heart. So in that case, love doesn't sound so bad. But that’s the thing, it's nice as long as it’s someone else that's doing it. So what's the reason he slammed the door at Renjun's face, his dorm mate, band member and best friend who might not be one anymore cause of Jeno's miserable attempt to stop Renjun from uttering another word about that one boy. The guy that Jeno is now supposedly in love with. He, Na Jaemin.

"What are we getting for dinner hyungs?" Jisung screamed from the living room to Jeno and Renjun who was in the kitchen trying to bake a very pretty strawberry cake and hoping it would turn out edible, unlike the muffins the duo tried last week which ended up tasting more like baking soda than chocolate. In renjun's defense, cooking and baking are two different worlds and there are too many unknown ingredients for him to show his skills. So jeno can't even fight back cause.. at least Renjun can cook to bluff about shits. Jeno is just straight-up bad at it. Both cooking and baking. "I TOLD YOU TO CHECK WHAT THAT BOY LIKE TO EAT AND ORDER IT DIDN'T I JISUNG??!" Haechan came out screaming from his room with colorful confetti wrapped around his upper body like a little puppy giving Jisung an annoyed look. Reading the air quickly Jisung put both his hands on his head to not get beaten from the 'very scary when he's hungry' Haechan. Jisung quickly took his phone and dialed his boyfriend's number before he actually gets smacked by his hyungs. "CHENLE-YA-" he started and then instantly went silent probably cause his words got cut off by the other in the line. "Ah- ah okay okay. Be quick I miss you" Jisung said while ending the call. What he didn't realize was Haechan was still standing there, still covered in confetti, still looking like a puppy and still glaring at Jisung. "AHH HYUNG CHENLE SAID HE BOUGHT THE FOOD ALREADY" Jisung said smiling proudly and cutely when he turned around and saw Haechan. Maybe it worked, maybe it didn’t cause Haechan turned around moving his death glare from Jisung to mark. "YA LEE MARK DO U EVEN KNOW HOW TO BLOW A BALLOON YOU'VE BEEN STUCK IT AT FOR 15 MINS NOW"

After an hour of decorating the living room, setting the table with the foods Chenle bought (which he said is Jaemin's favorite and that he had already checked with the manager and they all just hoped is true) all 6 members of dream stood there and stared at what they have prepared. "I swear to god if he doesn't like this I’m gonna end his life." Jeno said placing the pretty strawberry cake that was decorated with pink whipping cream and strawberries in the middle of the table and giving a self-satisfactory smile after realizing how it turned out really cute. "I heard he's very sweet so he'll like everything as long as Haechan doesn’t open his mouth and start doing that shit thing he does which is talking" Renjun said while taking off his baking gloves and placing them on the kitchen counter which he soon got a curse as a response from Haechan. To be very very honest, Jeno doesn't really like new people. When 2 months ago the management first said that nct dream will have an extra member added to the group he was surprised and filled with mixed emotions cause why now? after 3 years. Dream is doing well even as 6. And then the next month he heard that the management has decided who it'll be and that he is some kid called Na Jaemin who is a 2 month trainee. 2 months? Really SM? just how talented is he? Jeno thought. A part of Jeno wanted to go to the trainee practice room and take a look at the said boy who is supposedly a handsome, kind, and smart boy. And like that's not enough, rumors say he's one of the best trainees when it comes to skills. But Jeno was too busy with all the promotions of Boom that he quickly forgot bout the boy. After a few weeks, on his way to the practice room, Jeno saw one of the dream’s manager talking to a boy dressed in all black and when he passed by them he roughly heard the words "pack... Jaemin.. dorm" so Jeno figured out that that the boy is Jaemin whose face he didn't catch any glimpse of is gonna move into the dream's dorms. And Jeno was right. The next day their manager delivered the news to the dream members and Jeno saw all kinds of emotions on the members' faces. Mark as the oldest was calm, Haechan and Renjun were loud about how they don’t wanna share their room which leads to them arguing about who should be roommates with the new member while Chenle and Jisung were just happy to get another hyung that would do chores for them. And Jeno, he still didn't know how to react so he just thought he'll be himself and just try to accept what has been decided. 

And here they are now a few minutes before the main subject of the day arrives. He was fairly surprised by how the air is already awkward around here and the jaemin boy hasn't even arrived yet. Mark seemed like the most nervous as he was always the unannounced leader and was the most responsible among them without a doubt. Maybe that’s why he wanted to work this out more than anyone. When the doorbell rang the members actually looked at one another wondering who'll be the one to open the door. But without a word, jeno stood up and walked towards the door which he soon got a few "ooooohhh" cause honestly, it was cool. In jeno's mind, there was only one thing: this guy is gonna be a part of dream. So why not try to work things out. Jeno took a deep breath and opened the front door, preparing the smile he usually gives when he's in the variety show, the ones that are quick to appear and leave as fast as they appear. When he opened the door, to his surprise stood a guy who... actually looked like an angel. Now that's not a first impression you often get of people but jeno really wasn't expecting a boy this beautiful. Almost as tall as Jeno, a fragile-looking boy was standing on his door. He had Brunette hair which was pushed down like any typical teenager’s hairstyle but note that he looked nothing like how a typical teenager looks. Fair skin and soft facial features. He was wearing a long burgundy coat and blue jeans that gave off a perfect fall vibe. Looking really nervous, he started smiling widely the moment he saw jeno. "hi! Lee jeno." The unfamiliar yet so endearing boy said. And the space between them? It was 5 feet.

The air is still awkward around here. Jaemin entered the house with his luggage. The way they all welcomed him was different for each member but jaemin figured out that’s just how they are, very different from one another but had a bond that was obvious to everyone's eyes, and jaemin loved it. He honestly couldn’t wait for another second to be best friends with the members. But what he really could not wait to do was spending time with jeno (without freakin out or being creepy tbh). It could be considered as the aftereffect of watching too much of lee jeno content but jaemin was pretty much obsessed with that boy at this point. To avoid uncomfortable situations and according to jaemin it is considered as working hard, he could confidently say he watched every single video of nct dream that could be found on the internet. His intention was just to get to know the members more but don’t know how or when he slipped and fell into the dark hole called lee jeno and now he can't seem to come out of it. fancams, funny videos, dance practice, focus cam you name it. Jaemin has watched everything that has jeno in it and the amount of talent jeno posses is amazing in the eyes of jaemin. But jeno don't need to know all this, does he? Imagine a dude you just saw (who is practically your member after this so no way to escape) is actually a deeply fallen baby czennie of yours. Nope, not creepy at all folks. Will normal conversations be possible after that? So jaemin came up with a plan. A plan to avoid eye contact with lee jeno in every possible way till he calms his heart down which let's quote the man himself, Liu Yangyang said “that’s a fucked up plan nana”. Yangyang is a trainee in SM, as well as jaemin’s full-time adviser and best friend ever since in high school they decided to go for the entertainment industry together. According to yangyang, it was a shit plan and yangyang (saying from all the years of experience they got by doing tons of shit adventures together) is never wrong. So in the end it really was a shit plan cause the moment the door opened, the face jaemin saw was jeno’s. Shit jaemin wanted to run away so much. He realized how much of a bad decision it was to watch a very high number of your future member's videos cause now all he can see is a perfect human being, that looked so much like an angel to be called a human.

Jaemin was quite shocked seeing how much the members have put into decorating the place and preparing the foods. "I- thank you so much" jaemin was lost of words when he saw the colorful balloon words "WELCOME JAEMIN ♡" stuck to the wall and table filled with foods which some jaemin could recognize as his favorite foods and some that he doesn't mind eating. But the thing that caught his attention the most was the cake. "Aaah" jaemin gasped a little when he realized it was a strawberry cake. Hoping no one saw that disgusted look that quickly visited his face and disappeared just as soon, he turned around to look at members and gave a fond thank-you-i-love-it smile. "Let's eat!” Chenle said dragging jaemin to make him sit in the center chair of the dining table so that he can be visible to all the members and also hopefully get used to eating with 6 loud idiots. Jaemin took a seat, smile never fading away he looked at the dishes once again. "Is this coincidence or am I seeing quite a lot of my favorite foods?" he said giving a playful smirk. A blush rushed on chenle's cheeks as he says "I did my research" giving jaemin the cutest smile jaemin could have possibly seen. Jaemin wanted to squish chenle's cheeks so bad. Right after the cute exchange between jaemin and chenle they all started chucking down the food. Can they actually eat this much and look like this? Was the first thing that came to jaemin's mind watching how the members actually eat a little too much for idols. They all exchanged small talks and sweet smiles while eating and the overall mood was pretty good if you ask jaemin or anyone present in that room. Till. Till the time came and Renjun happily screamed "TIME FOR CAKEEE" and jaemin failed at keeping a straight face. "Do you not like cakes hyung?" Jisung asked quickly catching jaemin's nervous face. And to the question, jeno raised a brow looking at jaemin. He better not say he doesn’t like, jeno literally gave his all (and under the pressure of Huang Renjun) made this cake. "I-i don't eat strawberries" it came out almost like a whisper the members barely caught on it. "What the-" jeno spoke his thoughts out rather loudly and jaemin just wanted to die, he bit his lips. Jeno quickly got hissed by haechan which is a sign to shut his mouth and jaemin knew he was doomed. He just spoiled the entire mood so he squinted his eyes looking down at his lap. He just wanted to vanish into thin air and guess never come back to Korea ever again. "Ya, ya Huang Renjun I told you to check. Look at this now the boy's bout to cry " mark laughed attempting to make the tension disappear. "I swear to all gods I heard a trainee saying he gonna buy you your favorite strawberry cake and you were even laughing with him so I thought you liked strawberry cake a lot" Renjun almost rapped the words in defense to the attack that just approached him. Jaemin laughed painfully still looking down. "Its cause I hate strawberry flavor so much that they were teasing me with it. It's an inside joke among the trainees" Jaemin did the air quote, "na jaemin LOVEEE strawberries" and laughed again but this time he looked at Renjun. Well, fuck em, trainees. they just made jeno make a stupid mistake and all his effort was long gone. By the time the dinner ended only Jeno's awkwardness was left which was caused by his loud thoughts at the dinner table that everyone knows would have intimidated jaemin at least a bit. I mean, look at jeno. That man's existence is intimidating (till he shoots his eye smile obviously).

But the members were shocked of how jaemin was not feeling uncomfortable at all (Which he was, a little, but was just trying with all his willpower to make it look like he's not) At least na jaemin have a guaranteed acting job if he fails as an idol right? Jaemin was laid back yet still kept his manner and was talking formally throughout the entire night till mark pointed it out and told him to be more comfortable. And so jaemin did, he decided to call mark 'Hyung' and all the 00 liners by their first name and the babies by their first name as well but with extra affection (in his dreams can he call jeno affectionately he thought) The first time he called jeno barely by his first name was when he asked where the washroom was and Renjun told him to ask jeno to guide him and also give him a quick room tour. It was one of renjun's silly idea to make it less awkward among those two, as anyone in that room could tell they were hella awkward around each other and they are going to be roommates so what good would that do? Yes. NA JAEMIN IS GONNA BE ROOMMATES WITH THE LEE JENO, the Jeno he decided not to have any eye contact with cause his fanboying side was a little too hard to tone down. And yes jeno was going to be roommates with NA JAEMIN, the jaemin he was so sure he made uncomfortable and the jaemin that deep inside he thought, looked pretty when he smiles.

They were in their room. Their room yes. 5 feet away from one another. 5 feet is a safe distance for Jeno. He calls it the ambiguous distance cause you are not too close, yet too far. A perfect distance to start anything meaningful I’d say. Jaemin looked at the clean, new bed and moved his eyes to the bed that was a bed lamp away. It was messy but not too messy. Just like any teenager's room. "We can change if you want," jeno said pressing his fingers together, not looking at jaemin. But he got no response in return. FUCK I must have really messed up he doesn't even wanna talk. Jeno can't help but to think. So he raised his head to see the boy but to his surprise jaemin was already looking at him. Taken back a little when their eyes surprisingly locked, jaemin still gave jeno a sweet smile and said "its okay jeno I like it like this" Something at the back of jeno's head was screaming danger and the air in between his stomach and lungs wanted to jump out of his body. Without even realizing he pressed his fingers harder like its what he gotta do, keep a cool face and hope jaemin would not notice that pink shade on his cheeks. That smile of jaemin is dangerously addictive, Jeno made a note to himself mentally, to not trip over that smile easily.. Jeno gave an assured smile back. Maybe renjun's plan worked.


	2. shit luck but thanks God

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall I'm really just writing whatever that comes to my mind, so if yall like this I'm more than happy. enjoy reading this chapter as well and have a blessed week<3
> 
> Song recommendation for chapter 2: what should i do by Chen Yan

Weeks have passed and jaemin was doing a pretty decent job at getting used to the overall environment of the dorm. Before coming to the dorm, jaemin had a fair amount of people telling him about the rumors that circulate the Dreamies. “they all hate each other and its just business” a female trainee said to which a few other trainees nodded their head like they’ve seen it before(which they didn’t obviously but that’s how rumors work) “cant be..” jaemin said softly, with a quizzical look. “it’s a famous rumor. I’ve heard it as well. And last week I heard they passed by a few sunbaes and didn’t even bother to greet” a trainee who was a little bit older said, sighing. The entire time, jaemin was very confused which is because, after watching all of NCT dream’s content jaemin actually felt like they are more family-like than friends. So what’s with all these rumors. keeping everything he heard at the corner of his brain, it’ll be a lie if you say jaemin was not at least a little bit worried about the accuracy of the rumors. But Jaemin knew it the next day itself when he woke up to chenle's dolphin laugh, he was sure it was all groundless rumors. Jaemin thinks it's boisterous, the house and the members. And it’s perfect for someone like him. Jaemin is loud but jaemin is also an introvert. He has his up and down moods and sometimes he needs a loud surrounding or he’ll go too deep into his low mood and become really gloomy but the members are 90% noise and only 10% talking so that won’t be a problem. If all these time yangyang thought jaemin is loud, he should try living with the dream members, he bet his last cent yangyang will die within 5 hours. Jaemin’s introvert self was a little obvious for the first few days. He was still being quiet and only talked when someone initiated the conversation but soon he got used to the setting and in no time he started expressing himself more, his loud nature. 

During the day he practiced hard and at night he spends some time with the members. (the non jenos mostly) After the first-week jisung mentioned how jeno barely comes out of his room somedays. He spends most of his free time reading or playing games in the room and jaemin just feels too shy to be around jeno alone so he barely enters the room when jeno is there. He had been conscious of his every move when jeno is even slightly visible to his eyes. he just spends most his time in the living room or just invade other member's room and end up talking for hours and only go back to his room to sleep. Jaemin knew he can't be doing this forever and that he gotta get used to being around jeno, but his inner introvert self come bounding out whenever he sees jeno, and after hearing about it for a few days, yangyang now just calls it 'the jeno effect'. Like the time the members were having their dinner together in the living room and haechan made a funny comment about renjun's hair, jeno burst into laughter. jaemin just wanted to pinch both his cheeks and scream to the world how precious jeno is, albeit all jeno did was laugh. These kinds of situations are where the jeno effect jumps out. Anyone who's not na jaemin would have just simply laughed together and moved on but jaemin spent a good 1 minute not doing anything and just staring at the man who was laughing. Thank goodness no one noticed his disgusting 'let's get married and live happily ever after' face. Even when Mark gave him a weird eyebrow raise with a smirk, that's all he got at the end of the day so nothing to worry. Jaemin is still normal (hah.) to the eyes of the members. So every time some bare minimum interaction with jeno happens and jaemin gay panic text his best friend, yangyang first calls it the jeno effect and then proceeds to tease jaemin like the best-always-reliable friend that he is. 

Jeno can't believe he lost the game. For the third fucking time. Its the third week in a row and its fuckin time jeno win at least once. But no, he sucks at this stupid rock paper scissors so much he can't believe he became an idol with this shit luck. "HAH! LEE JENO KITCHEN WORK FOR THIS WEEK. AS WELL." Haechan screamed in joy and Jaemin laughed. Well, its always fun as long as it's not you that's suffering so nothing wrong in laughing jaemin. 2 years ago mark randomly suggested to assign jobs weekly among the members and they all just agreed but ever since the week after the suggestion and till now, mark has probably heard the sentence "you manipulated us, kids, into child labor" from haechan and chenle at least a million times. "MARK LEEEEE. live for a very long time okay?" Jeno took a sit on the couch, eyes fixed on mark, gritting his teeth in annoyance. Mark just put both his hands in air questionably "ya its not me, its your luck" Back then it seemed pretty good of a plan but now its all just regret for jeno. They play different games weekly but rock paper scissors happen more than twice a month cause after all they are just a bunch of lazy teens. The person who wins usually decide what they want to do. "Are you laughing jaeminie? Come come if you lose now u are with him on the kitchen work" Renjun said cracking his knuckles like he's getting ready for a fight. (just dramatic Renjun) "Ah I must win. I really don't wanna cook with jeno again. He's so bad at it" Renjun said giving jeno a quick irritated glare. Suddenly jeno remembered how jisung once said rock paper scissors are gonna be the reason for the extinction of humans but nowadays jeno feels it in him. It's not another bullshit from jisung. If Renjun loses now, jeno might need to leave the dorm. "COME ON COME ON" hyped up loud jaemin came face to face with hyped up loud Renjun, oh god.

"AAAAHHHHHHH" Jaemin screamed looking at his hand in betrayal. "hOw KEn yOu DO THIS TO MEeee" jaemin spoke in disbelief to his hand. It's the typical jaemin after having too much coffee. Loud, lowkey caffeine high. Straight up weird but he prefers the word 'eccentric' more. "Na jaemin lee jeno in the kitchen this week, "Chenle said laughing and clapping his hands, who later got joined by all the other members like they just witnessed some amazing shit but in reality, it was just jaemin and jeno in misery. 

No one has ever tasted jaemin's food before but everyone knows how it is when jeno cooks, it's like the cooking legends park jisung and lee mark gave birth and the baby is jeno. (Please understand the sarcasm). The most jeno can do is help with the ingredients that too under the unmoving scrutiny of Renjun. The members all sat in the living room facing the kitchen, ready with their cookies and chocolate milk, to watch the kitchen drama and also maybe when the time comes, to rescue the kitchen from jeno and jaemin. "They'll burn the kitchen. 10 dollars" haechan said munching on his cookie. "Nah they can't be that bad" Mark countered. "talk only when you're betting your money sweetie," Renjun said giving mark a wink. "but jaemin hyung might be good at cooking" jisung said. "We'll see if you can still say that after trying the food. Yall are about to appreciate my cooking" Renjun replied clinging himself to jisung who looked like he's suffering internally. They all looked at the two who were at the kitchen discussing god knows what with stern looks.

"Soooo, can you cook?" Jeno asked hands crossed, face serious. Honestly, he was just worried they'll burn down the kitchen and be kicked out of SM. Jeno has never seen jaemin cook before. Ever since he came to the dorms, it was always Renjun cooking with chenle and haechan helping him here and there. They also often order food so there was never a chance to see na jaemin cook. "Hmmm. What happens if I say I can't" jaemin said putting his apron on. "Then I'm just gonna call the Chinese place to order food right away." jeno said looking at jaemin with a very concerned look, jaemin tittered. For jaemin, it was funnier cause he knows jeno was dead serious. 

Jeno was surprised multiple times that night. first when he lost the game and now, jaemin's overall semblance when he's cooking. Jeno didn't want to agree but Jaemin looked like a professional chef when he's focusing. Gentle eyes, calm lips that sometimes turn into a small pout and delicate hands that looks like it's made to only touch things made of velvet. A prince charming, even when he's cooking. if he's going to see this Jaemin often, then he maybe should really move out of the dorm. This is very bad for Jeno's heart. He should be cutting the tomatoes in small dices but here he was, standing there relishing the moment, adoring jaemin. Jeno was slightly gutted when he realized how he was the only one staring at jaemin, a little too much than he should when jaemin's pivot definitely wasn't jeno. The most jaemin spoke was when he told jeno to wash the ingredients or when asking jeno where the ingredients were. Other than that he was too busy cooking. Although the members made some comments here and there, the most he did was laugh a little. "Jeno-ya, come here" jaemin called for jeno who was washing the dishes. "Try it," he said pointing the kimchi stew that was boiling in the pot. Jeno looked at the stew and then at jaemin and then again at the stew, muddles if he should take the risk. But Jaemin looked confident. Jaemin always looks confident but its a different kind of confidence today. The confidence was there the entire night if you ask. Like he knows whatever that Jeno's gonna taste, is going to be amazing. So putting his trust on jaemin jeno took a spoon full of the steaming hot stew. He leaned his head a little towards the pot and brought the spoon near his mouth and continued to blow on it softly, making his glasses to fog up. Jaemin couldn't help but smile foolishly looking at him. "FUCK" Jeno emitted right when the sour spicy taste hit his throat. It was really one of the best kimchi stew he tasted in his life. He turned his head to jaemin's direction. Jaemin's proud smile was back replacing the foolish one that was there a while ago. "So can I cook or what?" Jaemin said giving a playful smirk to which jeno nodded aggressively like a little obedient puppy. 

"How did you learn cooking? Can you bake too?? Renjun that idiot said cooking and baking are two different worlds and I couldn't even argue back cause I don't know shit. Damm but if you can cook and bake as well that'll be fucking cool" jeno was bug-eyed as he bombarded jaemin with questions. Jeno was playing game but he just threw his phone on the bed and started asking questions the moment jaemin entered the room. He genuinely looked interested which just made jaemin swoon more. Jeno behaving like this definitely is not helpful for jaemin's heart. Especially when it just goes crazy simply at the sight of lee jeno smiling. It's 1 am, why is jeno doing this to jaemin. Jaemin took a deep breath, internally screaming to his heart to shut tf up but guess who's not listening. "I- slow down a bit you are too hyped" jaemin let out a soft chuckle. "Ya ya later. Now tell me first. Can you bake as well?" Jeno is clueless it's painful to watch.

"Okay... Yes, I can bake but not as well as cooking. And yes Renjun was right. Cooking and baking are different"  
"Shit" jeno pouted and continued asking questions to which jaemin calmly replied.  
In a way, jaemin has always wanted this. Long talks with jeno. Laughing together. Getting to see his precious smile so jaemin wanted to enjoy the night as much as he could but jeno’s looks were not being helpful, not at all. Is it cause of the weather or is jeno just too fucking cute in sweats and glasses under dim lights? Jaemin felt his palms getting sweaty and ears red when he started reading jeno’s looks, not a good sign. Jaemin feels this thing. This feeling of not wanting the moment to end whenever he sees Jeno’s smile. It does things to his heart and makes his mood bright for the rest of the day. Jeno’s smile was jaemin’s coffee and as much as he shouldn't, he just loves that light drunk feelings. The rest of the night was just jeno exclaiming in excitement every time jaemin mentions a food he can cook and jaemin just being a pink balloon that might burst if jeno gives another goddam smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look forward to the next one and thanks for reading<3


	3. was putting on a mic always this gay?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay here i am again >< with yet another gay panic chapter  
> i hope yall like this cause this is my favourite chapter by far writing this story.  
> there's text exchange between nana and yangyang in the middle don't get confused <3
> 
> this chapter's song recommendation is I Miss You by Mamamoo (the ost)
> 
> ENJOY READINGGGG <3

Jaemin's debut was closer than ever. To the members, Jaemin was nothing less than a professional. He was always being respectful and considerate towards everyone while filming and even during recordings he tried his best. Although it's his first time for almost everything, he did a great job that even the producers and directors praised him for being a quick learner. But it was what people were seeing on the outside. Confident, good at everything, always happy jaemin. But on the inside, he was controlling himself. Stopping his body, by all means, to not breakdown in nervous sweats. Jaemin always felt pressure around him, growing up. Not from his parents, they never expected anything more than what he wishes to be seen as, but from society. A young boy with a pretty face and sweet character and lots of talent. Jaemin made heads turn wherever he went ever since a young age. So deep inside, there's always something telling him that he is not good enough and that he has to do better if he wants to be loved. He sees the best in people, but the worst in him. It's an ugly truth jaemin will never tell another. But the members were always there, always having his back, helping him whenever he needed something and sticking by his side even on the days he was pretending to be alright. It's like they knew he was struggling deep down and was ready to help him. 

Jaemin tiptoed, trying his best to make the least noise. Its the fourth time this week jaemin is entering his own house like a thief. “jaemin?” a sleepy voice called for him in the dark while he was trying to take off his shoes. **Shit.** Jaemin froze in horror. The lights flickered opened and haechan was standing there, one hand rubbing his eyes and another one on the switch, he looked really confused. “dude what time is it?” he asked eyes barely opened, throaty voice. “five. Go to sleep. why are you awake??” jaemin whisper shouted. “hello? I should be asking you that." Haechan snorted as he walked to the kitchen, looking like he had no intention of keeping his voice down. "You just came in?” he continued as he opened the refrigerator to take out a bottle of water. “yea I was practicing,” jaemin said, taking off his shoes and quietly putting them away in the shoe rack. “what are you both doing at this hour?” another voice was heard somewhere and jaemin hastily glazed. It was half-awake ‘I fuckin hate waking up in the morning’ jeno walking to the kitchen table like a small boy. Hair messed up, eyes smaller than usual under his huge glasses and dry chapped lips which still somehow looked attractive to jaemin's eyes. If it wasn’t for that broad shoulders and muscles he could easily pass as a 10-year-old in that blue bear pajamas. “I had a nightmare and he just came back home,” haechan said pointing at jaemin, a small yawn escaping from his mouth. “you just came back?!” jeno stared at jaemin in surprise. “hehe I was practicing and now I'm hungry” jaemin ran to the kitchen counter and started rummaging over the snacks that were laying abandoned. Maybe the snacks jisung bought last week and forgot about because he was too busy with the 12 different flavors ice creams Renjun bought. A quick hit on his hand and jaemin yelped to the sudden pain. It was jeno. (it has been 5 fuckin minutes since he woke up. Where does he get all the energy from) “ahheee” jaemin whined like a little baby and jeno wasn’t ready for any na jaemin cute bullshits at 5 in the morning. It was awfully early for any giddy sensations so he walked away not even looking at jaemin and saying “eat breakfast”. “I AM trying to” jaemin argued back rubbing the spot that jeno just hit. “proper breakfast.” jeno gave jaemin a last glance before entering the washroom to wash up. Jaemin knows exactly what that stare means so he just looked at the snacks with a pout while haechan laughed, “yea man eat some proper food, and please get some rest you look terrible” haechan said and shortly bid his good night to go back and continue his precious sleep. Haechan’s right, jaemin really looked terrible. He’s only been getting a maximum of 3 hours of sleep a day. They have lots of shooting and recording prior to the comeback so they are busy with that in the mornings and at night he’s usually in the practice room practicing for hours, again and again till he feels satisfied. It was exhausting him mentally and physically but jaemin had no intention to slow down or rest. Yes, it might be just another comeback for the rest, but for jaemin, it was the start of his life. The life he dreamt of since he was 12. So he was ready to do everything to make it perfect.

When jeno came out of the washroom all freshen up, he saw jaemin on the kitchen table chomping on his egg and toast. It was definitely brighter than when he went to shower. The sky was changing to light shade of blue and jaemin opened the windows to get some fresh air. it was still spring so the weather was just right, morning or night. Jeno leaned back on the door frame, face going soft looking at jaemin. Jaemin looked tired and worn out, unlike the usual jaemin, this jaemin was just barely living, it was heart-rending for jeno to watch him like that. A part of him wanted to caress that soft hair and give jaemin a tight comforting hug (like friends do) but jeno was quick to make the thought to go back to wherever it came from in the first place. He convinced himself that smiling is just as effective, so he walked to the bored, mostly tired jaemin who was just playing with his fork now. Jaemin looked up from his fork and found jeno flashing a joyful smile. Nothing new, just jeno in his casual skin tight ripped jeans and oversized green hoodie (looking like a fuckin meal) smiling brightly at jaemin, making jaemin die a little in the inside. So your heart works the same even if you didn't sleep for several days huh. Still going crazy over lee jeno even when he was feeling like he had sandbag under his eyes. Jaemin wanted to give back the same energy but it was almost 6 and he seriously didn’t have any energy left so he just gave a faint smile back. Jaemin stood up and brought his plate to wash, jeno just stood there watching jaemin's fragile back and how somedays it looks really broad and confident but today it just looks heavy. "Ermmm I'm going for JSMR recording. Do you want anything? I can pick it up for you on the way back" jeno said biting his lips hoping jaemin will ask something, anything actually, so he can buy it for him and jaemin gets happy and suddenly he's back to the loud happy jaemin. "Uhmmm Nah.. I don't have anything I want actually" jaemin said wiping his hands on the kitchen cloth and walking towards jeno. 5 feet. Jaemin stopped. He stood there smiling at jeno. This time, without even realizing jeno took a step forward. 4 feet. "Have a great day jeno I'm gonna sleep now. and thanks for asking yea" jaemin smiled warmly and walked past jeno, closing the room door leaving jeno alone in the living room. 

“he smells like autumn” jaemin dropped on his bed inhaling deeply, he shut his eyes closed, smiling.

Yangyang♡

Good luck♡♡♡

_**Nana♡** _  
_**I'm dying I can't do this.** _  
_**I don't think I can** _

Yangyang♡

Obviously, you can.

You can do everything 

in this world except for

talking to lee jeno without gay panicking.

So don't underestimate 

yourself. It's just a debut

stage, not lee jeno :)

_**Nana♡** _  
_**Are you perhaps,,,,** _  
_**trying to be helpful?** _

Yangyang♡

Is it working?

_**Nana♡** _  
_**No yangyang.** _

Yangyang♡

Bitch bye.

_**Nana ♡** _  
_**....** _

Yangyang♡

No, but seriously,

there's nothing in this

world you can't do. You'll

do great<3 my favorite

Idol<3 go rock it

_**Nana♡** _  
_**What would I do without you** _  
_**Yangyang???? TT** _

Yangyang♡

what is that question

You'll die.

For sure.

_**Nana♡** _  
_**BITCH BYE.** _

Yangyang♡

<3 

jaemin placed his phone down on the table, smiling and feeling a little better cause of his best friend. He took a deep breath a few times. his hands were still shaking and the waiting room was too loud, not helping him to calm his heart even a little. He took the equipment and carefully left the waiting room. There were too many people, he needed a quiet place. He needed a place where he can focus and get his thoughts straight. If he goes upstage like this, he was so sure he'll mess everything up. Everything he has worked hard for, everything his members have worked hard for, he can't let the hard work go down the drain. Not after he saw how hard the dream members train every day. 

He walked till he found an empty, dim corridor that looked like a perfect spot for couples to be intimate without anyone noticing. There was just a few big boxes field with, what looked like stage props. Jaemin hid in the middle of the boxes. He was too focused on getting his thoughts straight, he didn't realize there was someone a few steps away, staring at him and his movements. He opened his black equipment box which had the words 'na jaemin' written neatly at the top corner of it. He looked at it, it was new to him. No one has really taught jaemin how to put on a mic and it didn't cross his mind till now to learn it. Maybe he was too focused on all the big things he forgot to learn something so simple. When he was standing in front of it with no idea how to use it, he felt his organs freaking out and slowly coming up to his eyes in the form of tears. Jaemin suddenly felt a strong urge to run away. He was too afraid to do it. What if he messes up. what if it all ends as soon it begins. What if he can't do it. Jaemin's self-esteem was at the bottom than ever. His trembling hands' wouldn't stop. He tightened his grip on the box. It's like all the stress and anxiety and fatigue that built up in him in the past few weeks are gonna come bursting out. "Need a hand?" He heard a familiar voice together with footsteps nearing him. He turned around and found a very calm jeno next to him. Jaemin wanted to cry, no. Jaemin wanted hug jeno tightly and cry. the tears that were gonna fall out any moment made his eyes look glassy and Jeno pouted a little to the sight of it. "It's okay I’m here, ill help you." He said, giving jaemin a sweet eye smile and putting a hand on jaemin's shoulder. He patted it softly and slowly till jaemin calms down. "Soooo you can't cry. You can't make that eye makeup to get ruined. Let's cry later after you are done. Okay?" Jeno said, still smiling. He took the mic from the box and slowly untangled the wire. Jaemin looked up to the ceiling trying hard to stop his tears from falling. Jeno can't help but let out a soft chuckle. Jaemin was too cute to not to. "hold this" he handed jaemin the untangled mic. Jeno then took out the in-ear belt from the box. "Turn around and pull up your shirt a little," jeno said, taking a step closer, voice deepening. Jaemin followed what he was told to do. If a few minutes ago he was nervous about going upstage, now he is nervous cause of lee Jeno's presence. Extremely nervous. He could feel every single nerve in his body alarming him. "Nervous huh?" Jeno laughed. "Ah-huh?" Jaemin was surprised. Is jaemin's heartbeat that loud? Did jeno actually heard it? "it was the same for my debut as well," jeno said bringing his hand around jaemin's waist to put on the in-ear belt. Jaemin let out a relieved breath hearing it but his body hardened up to the touch of lee jeno. He stopped breathing. Jeno did it so softly, almost as if just mere touching could leave scars on jaemin's soft skin. The most were just Jeno's fingertips, slightly brushing jaemin's hips now and then. "Okay," he said pulling down jaemin's shirt. "Turn around" jeno's voice was still deep. If jaemin didn't notice it before, he definitely does now that his face is dangerously close to jeno's. What did he realize? That jeno can't possibly be human. His dark perfectly shaped eyebrows, focused eyes that have so much power in it. The small mole near his eyes. The mole that makes jeno look like a small puppy, Jaemin wanted to kiss it. Jeno's lips, so so kissable and pretty. It must be really soft. Jaemin got embarrassed by his own thoughts. Jaemin took his time learning every feature of Jeno's face while he stood there waiting for jeno to put the mic on him. Jeno took another step forward, putting the mic around jaemin's head and on his ears. Jeno has his own safe distance with people. But he keeps finding himself crossing it when its jaemin. 5 feet seems too far. Jeno wants to go near jaemin, want to touch him, hold him, but any distance less than that makes jeno desperate for air. Every step he takes forward his heart beats twice as fast. He doesn't know what's safe and what's not anymore. Jeno adjusted jaemin's hair that got messed a little because of the mic and Jaemin felt a shiver running through his body to the smooth touch of Jeno's cold fingers. Jaemin's eyes stopped at Jeno's eyes after roaming all of jeno's face. And for a second, he swears for a goddam second he felt like Jeno's eyes looked at his the same way jaemin was looking at jeno. With so much unexplained emotions and intensity. "Put this inside your shirt from the back" jeno's voice was back to normal, he is no more looking at jaemin or is he near him. He moved back, the same 5 feet after saying the last words, letting jaemin to fix the wire of his own mic. "I'll go first, take your time and come. you'll do great jaemin, don’t worry about anything. you've worked hard for this." jeno said before giving jaemin his casual smile and walking off, leaving jaemin alone with all these overwhelming feelings. 

Jeno couldn't stop himself from walking fast. He entered the waiting room not even realizing how loud his entrance was, which lead to everyone's attention shifting to him for a moment. He couldn't care less. He had to do something. Something that would stop his heart from beating like crazy. "Ya, you're red," mark said walking towards jeno. "Jeno-ya?" Now Renjun called for him. "Uh-huh?" Jeno looked up and saw both Renjun and mark looking at him worriedly. "Are you okay? Your face is really red. Like very red man" mark said placing a hand on jeno's shoulder. How is jeno supposed to explain to mark. That he is not alright and he doesn't know why. Will mark understand why when he says that jeno's heart is beating mad fast as if it no more wants to stay inside his body, caged. "ya say something. You're scaring us" Renjun added taking a step closer to put his palm on Jeno's forehead to check for fever but before Renjun could properly place it on his forehead, jeno quickly pushed it away. "No no I'm perfectly fine. I just ran up the stairs for exercise" he blurted out whatever that came to his mind. Thinking again, it's kind of a stupid thing to say especially when you want the attention to shift away from you. "There's really no normal people here anymore," Mark said in a dramatic tone walking away. But Renjun was still there, staring at jeno not buying what he just said. Renjun probably sees through jeno in a very obvious state. They've been best friends for 6 years and every time jeno lies about something it never gets through Renjun. Everyone but not him, cause Renjun knows jeno. "I'm serious. Its cause of the stairs" jeno reassured Renjun with a smile. Renjun looks little to not convinced at all but he just sighed and shook his head. Maybe he's tired of lee jeno and his never-ending bullshits. Jeno was relieved. "Hyung did you see jaemin hyung? Stylist noona is looking for him." Chenle questioned Renjun. Again. Jeno's heart is beating crazy fast to the sound of that name. He froze. "What's with this hyung now?" Chenle asked, pointing at jeno, making a slightly disgusted slightly confused face that he pulls off the best. Renjun turned back and found a stiff jeno, looking terrified and red again. "Ahhh I don't know anymore," Renjun said shaking his head ignoring everything and walking away from both chenle and jeno.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so how was it sksksksk ???  
> the mic part is really funny cause I wrote it when jaemin demonstrated how to wear a mic in that dream concert behind video. its been a while but when I was writing this I just thought of that scene so I went through my notes and found what I wrote back then to use as reference.
> 
> Please note that updates might be delayed cause im a college student who has multiple tests and assignment submissions a week when her finals r nearing. Thank you


	4. alcohols, hugs and lots and lots of feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I was gone for a while but like my finals r nearing TT like I say I gave up on college a million times a day but it's hard to actually do it asjsjsjs so I was just doing college work for the past few weeks and ill still be busy for another 3 weeks but ill try to update. if I don't please wait for me TT once im done with this stupid semester ill hv all the time in the world <3
> 
> ANYWAYSSSSS  
> song recommendation for this chapter: 1,2,3 by NCT DREAM <3

If one thing that small intimate moment (jaemin thinks their faces were close enough to consider it intimate) did, it will be how the air is different now, different from when they first shared their room, because now its all messy. Like someone ate a huge candy and dropped the half-eaten candy on the floor and jeno accidentally stepped on it and now the entire place is just so sticky and uneasy to be at. That's how he’s been feeling ever since that day at the music show backstage. You could say its the process of coming to terms with the fact that your heart is going crazy about someone. A man to be precise, but the feelings in the first place are very bizarre. Jeno thinks he has lived for a good amount of time and met a fair amount of attractive people, especially when you’re in the entertainment industry almost everyone you meet is the potential next top model, but no one makes him feel like jaemin. Jaemin is just different. Jaemin's smile, jaemin's laugh, jaemin's habits, the way he plays with his hair while waiting for food, the way he bites his lips when he's dazing away till its all chapped and dry, or even the way he locks his fingers with the members and fondly smiles at them, everything. It makes jeno weak at his knees. Is this love? He doesn't know. Cause somehow its something he has never felt before and for jeno, everything new and sudden is scary and is most likely to end in disaster.

The dorm was oddly quiet. Haechan and mark went to the 127 dorms for the 127 debut anniversary celebration and said they'll be staying the night. It's weekend and they had no schedule for the next few days so Jisung went to his parents' dragging Chenle along, making a huge mess in the dorm, packing all the pointless things they bought together over the years together with their couple pajamas. They planned for a cozy home date night which only got a disgusting stare from Renjun like that isn't what they do in the dorm all day long. So the huge, always noisy dorm was quiet after a long time leaving only Renjun, jaemin, and jeno. And when Renjun left them both alone in the living room at 10 pm saying he was gonna sleep early, jaemin and jeno officially became mannequins. 

"Wanna watch a movie?" Jeno broke the silence after a good 15 minutes, raising both his eyebrows and forming a tight smile (typical awkward jeno look I’d say)

"Wanna have a drink?" Jaemin threw back a question as an answer to Jeno's question, looking straight into his eyes. Jeno wondered, to that look, if Jaemin knows about the things it does to Jeno's lungs. He wondered if jaemin will still be cruel enough to look into Jeno's eyes like that if he ever gets to know. That stare with no smile, no frown, just calmness, and a hint of something unreadable. 

It pulls Jeno's chest down to his stomach and then after 5 seconds when it's supposed to go back to normal, it releases millions of butterflies instead, making him a (hot) human-butterfly mess.

After 15 minutes of hopeless scrolling in all of Netflix's 'because you watched', they concluded that they don't actually share the same taste in movies and just settled for a newly released action movie. Although action is not jaemin's cup of tea and he would not pay to watch anything that would make him say "ouchh", he agreed to watch it cause Jeno's eyes lit up for a millisecond seeing the title of the movie and jaemin likes jeno a little too much to not notice it. So they decided to watch a newly released action movie while having some beer. After another 15 minutes, into the movie, jaemin realized how the living room is pretty chilly when it's empty, so he ran to their shared room and came back dragging both his and Jeno's huge blankets with a proud grin on his face like he just did something that would make jeno pat his head and give him a snack. ( If jaemin looked anything like a cat then maybe jeno would have) He dropped Jeno's blanket on his body, making sure it half covers his face, intentionally just to hear jeno whine a little and then settled in next to jeno. Not too close, exactly 3 foot away cause jaemin's brain reminisced,

"hmm personal space is very important and it's so much sexier when you know how to respect it"  
the wise words of everyone's favorite trainee, Liu yangyang.  
jaemin sighed as he covered himself in his blanket breathing in all the warmth and daisy scent (his favorite liquid detergent, do not judge or he'll pout). 

Moonlight was peaking in through the slight gap of the living room curtains, dancing a little to the curtain's and wind’s joined rhythm, casting beautiful white light directly on the coffee table. And when jeno rested his legs directly on the spot the light was hitting and started playing his toes to the same rhythm like a baby, jaemin felt his entirety warming and melting to the picturesque sight.

"Jeno"

"Hmm?" 

"I'm bored." Jaemin leaned in and put his head on Jeno's shoulder, after almost an hour of comfortable silence and well-protected personal space.

Well, for jeno that was sudden. Jaemin could have given him a sign or something cause jeno really couldn't move a single inch now that jaemin’s head is on his shoulder. It's like suddenly everything around him is blurry and the loud voices from the television are all muffled up in the background. His heart rate spiked and if he was unlucky maybe jaemin heard it too. No, jeno is actually sure jaemin heard it cause that's how loud it was. If jeno’s heart had a mouth he was so sure it would have cursed the living shit outta him for doing this. For making himself so weak for jaemin. Jeno felt jaemin's soft hair brushing his jaw as he moved in a little more towards Jeno's chest to nestle. it tickled his lower stomach and definitely did not help his already unstable heart. Jaemin's hair smells like white daisy, jaemin's hair is soft like clean cotton, jeno made mental notes even in the middle of the chaos that is his heart. He screamed internally when he realized jaemin was on his right chest, now more comfortable and closer than ever.

jeno hesitated for a good 5 minutes. All the reasons why they shouldn't be like this right now visited his head one after another. If it was really lee jeno. The jeno that jeno thinks he is, he should by now pushed jaemin away in a not so rude way cause 

a. Jaemin **IS** in his personal space and

b. They are not that close enough to be snuggling 

but he didn't listen to anything his brain said and eventually slowly wrapped his arm around jaemin and when he did it, he felt jaemin's cheeks getting squished to his chest as a smile forme. it was like a praise for the stupid move he just made.

"My alcohol tolerance is shit," jaemin said giggling a little. 

"I can see it. You became a baby" jeno said now brushing jaemin's cotton-like soft hair with the tip of his fingers. He can't help but think what will happen if any of the members walk into them right now. Its nothing weird. This is how haechan is with all the members. This is how Renjun is with Jisung. This is how Dream is, but why does it feel like Jeno's doing something extremely wrong and is about to be punished when he does it with jaemin. 

"hehe" jaemin's laugh brought jeno back to reality. It's probably because of the alcohol but apparently, the movie is very funny now, all of a sudden (note that it's still the action movie). Action is Jeno's favorite genre. When jaemin finally agreed to watch something jeno was glad it’s this movie cause he's been wanting to watch it for a long time now. But hell can he concentrate now. _So fuck the movie_ he said, mentally. All jeno can feel is his nervous heart. 

"Are you like this at home too?" Jeno asked now patting jaemin's head softly. 

"Huhhh like what?" Jaemin said sounding drunk and sleepy as he wrapped his free hand around Jeno's waist.

Jeno can no more escape reality. He is here, wrapped inside na jaemin's tight embrace. As much as he wants to run away from whatever this situation should be called, his body gave up long ago cause honestly, it feels so good to be hugged like this. Like you are loved and you matter. Like you know for sure this person will be there for you, even when you are standing at the edge of a cliff. Sharing each other's body heat with slight alcohol in your system. It feels like love, although a part of him very well know jaemin is doing this cause of alcohol.

"This. Clingy puppy things" jeno could feel his throat getting dry. Nervous maybe? 

"I have no one to cling onto at home tho. I'm the only child" jaemin said every word in a whiny tone.

Maybe that's why he's clingy. He just wants some attention. Jeno understands how an only child gets lonely easily, trust him he has seen haechan and how clingy he is with literally everyone.

"You smell like autumn," Jaemin said indulging all of Jen's scent with a wide grin of satisfaction. "My favorite autumn" he hugged jeno tightly, whispering. Yeap that's all it took for Jeno's heart to go crazy again. At that very moment, Jeno's lips trembled. The twisting feeling in his lower stomach took a sharp turn and now all the organs in his body are just straight up wilding. What is that? He asked himself. Why is it happening whenever jaemin utters a word, he wondered. 

"Ahjussi, stop saying weird stuff” he forced himself to joke, it was the only possible thing to do then. He definitely can't say "you too. can we do this every day?" like, that'll be gay. Very gay. (Although that's exactly what he wanted to say) Jeno sighed softly at jaemin's cute drunk confessions and how easy it is for jaemin to do this entire showing affection thing without freaking out. Maybe its easy cause jaemin doesn't feel all these crazy sensations in him to the touch of jeno. Its easy cause to jaemin, jeno is just another member. Jeno thought maybe he can get drunk as well. Get drunk and forget thinking about what is the meaning of this feeling he's feeling and just cuddle with jaemin like there's no tomorrow. But Jeno's alcohol tolerance is annoyingly high he hates it now. 

Jeno gave up thinking after a while and just played with jaemin's soft hair till he doesn't know when they fell asleep like that on the couch, god knows after how many cans of beer.

But when jaemin woke up around 7 am when it was slowly getting bright outside he found himself being covered in his blanket on the couch. Jeno was nowhere near and it felt cold. Like all the warmth he was feeling a few hours ago was just left to make him feel nostalgic and wonder if it even happened. He went to sleep slightly regretting all the clingy things he did when he was drunk and mostly missing jeno’s warm body.

Jaemin woke up again to the loud noise of Renjun and chenle bickering in Chinese and sunlight burning his cheeks. He couldn't understand much but with the preschool mandarin knowledge he had, he could somehow tell it was about food. He woke up and instantly felt pain hitting the back of his head.

"Shit" he groaned clasping the back of his head. 

"Did jeno chase you outta the room or something?" Renjun asked sipping coffee from the kitchen counter, not a tone that was expecting a reply so jaemin didn’t bother to give him one but chenle was staring at jaemin with a slight smirk which of course jaemin didn’t notice. 

"I'm not that rude" jaemin heard another voice which for sure belonged to jeno.  
He felt his ears heating up real quick. He didn't know why but him hugging jeno tightly and resting his head on Jeno's chest was the only image that was repeating on his head. Everything he did the night before was the reason his brain cells were asking him to run away. He was so embarrassed he was sure as hell he could say goodbye to being close with jeno after all those shits he said last night. He turned around and saw jeno walking towards the dining table flashing a quick eye smile when his eyes met jaemin's. Okay maybe it wasn't bad, seeing how jeno is still smiling, jaemin still have hope to stay in the same room. 

"Ah Jaemin, you should seriously fix your drinking habits. OHHH my arms hurt so bad man" jeno said tossing some toast on his plate.

**AND THERE GOES NA JAEMIN'S REPUTATION.**

Jaemin squinted his eyes shut, the will to live leaving his body gracefully. He wanted satan to end him right there but nothing he asked for was happening so he had to eventually open his eyes. "Ha ha" jaemin intones as he stood up "stop it jeno lee," he said walking to the washroom with an obviously annoyed grin and red ears and a little fast-paced but it was more like running away from embarrassing yourself in front of your crush. 

Jeno can't help but laugh. "It's actually nice to see you both not being awkward around each other" Renjun said taking a bite of his toast. "What you mean, I was not awkward around him," jeno said trying his best to sound like he was baffled by Renjun’s statement. "Yea sure sweetie" was all he got as a reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you are still reading IM MORE THAN GRATEFUL. idk why but i feel like this chapter is short skssksk ill make it up with the next chapter. love every single one of you<3 stay safe don't get hurt<3 
> 
> p.s updates might take time cause sadly I'm still a college student with hell lots of deadlines

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed and please look forward for the next chapters <3


End file.
